ANT-MAN July 17, 2o15

Okay, I admit it. When I heard that Paul Rudd would be the ANT-MAN, I about cried! Holy crap! Could there be a worse actor to cast in a “serious” action movie?! Horrible images of good actors doing bad things to our belovèd Comic book heroes flashed in my mind:  Ben Affleck’s puffy-chested, Daredevil (stoic to a fault), Seth Rogen’s dopey, misplaced humor in The Green Hornet, and let’s not forget the gratefully dead Fantastic Four franchise that was so pathetically NOT FUNNY when it was trying so hard to BE funny! No, please, no Paul Rudd! Now, don’t get me wrong, I actually love Rudd in romantic comedies (Clueless {1995} for example) and stupid comedies (Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy {2004}, The 40-Year-Old Virgin {2005} which really aren’t my cup of funny but Rudd was good  in them). No! A comedian taking on a serious, action-packed Marvel super hero film? No way, Michael Peña! Comic book heroes are serious business! You can’t mix straight-up comedy with hardcore, intense comic book action!

 

Now having got all that out of my system, let me say that . . . ANT-MAN IS ONE OF THE GREATEST ACTION/COMEDY MOVIES I HAVE EVER, EVER SEEN! And it’s due to two important elements:

1. One hell of a great script! It is intelligent, very witty and when it needs to being extremely earnest and action packed.  And the comedy, the humor isn’t forced on the script but comes directly from the actions of the characters. The writers (Paul Rudd, Edgar Wright, Adam McKay, Joe Cornish) created a well-balanced comedy/thriller that had me laughing and hootin’ and hollerin’ and totally buying the drama of ANT-MAN!

2. Just great casting! Paul Rudd (as Scott Lang/ANT-MAN) and Michael Peña (as Luis) are a frigging comedy duo of awesomeness, never losing the momentum or diminishing the terrifying, super villain  . . . villainy of YELLOWJACKET (played by hairless Corey Stoll). Not to be dismissed are Michael Douglas (Hank Pym, the “mad” scientist who created and wore the first ANT-MAN suit), Evangeline Lilly (as Hope van Dyne, Hank Pym’s Kick-Ass-And-Take-A–Few-Names daughter) Annnnnd Abby Ryder Fortson as Scott Lang’s seven year old kid who is outrageously cute, and extraordinarily lovable and a heck of an actor! Hell, the whole cast is GREAT!

 

The only complaint that I might have is that every now and then the ant army’s CGI was a tad out of sync. But to be honest again, it’s such a slight hiccup I can’t complain about it too much. Look, ANT-MAN is one of Marvel’s best super hero/action movies to ever grace the screen. Sure, the action is powerful and somewhat frightening but not overly so. It is rated PG-13, but tends to be more PG than 13.  ANT-MAN has a different feel to it than say the Avengers, Captain America or even the X-Men. However, if you love Marvel movies, you should . . .  GO SEE IT! GO SEE IT! GO SEE IT! Right NOW!

Terminator: Genisys July 2o15

 

 

Ten minutes into Terminator Genisys (General Identification System {computer system for biological identifications} just in case you thought it might just be a typo) I heard a very soft but distinct voice speak to me:

 

” Listen, and understand! That Terminator is out there! It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.”

 

It was a warning from the future . . . from Sergeant Kyle Reese directly to me: “This movie wants to kill you!”

 

Terminator: Genisys is murderously slow and explicitly cumbersome. It’s an action film without a lick of action in it. Oh, sure, there’s plenty of gunfire, lots of CGI enhanced explosions (one of which is a rip off from The Matrix), car chases and crashes, killer Terminator-exterminators, a slow motion sequence of a school bus flipping over lengthwise across the Golden Gate Bridge leaving the occupants (Sarah and Kyle) hanging Barrel of Monkeys style over the Golden Gate strait looking all Wile E. Coyote eyed hoping that  someone (I wonder who) will come along and haul them out of danger—but all that doesn’t add up to much because action isn’t guns going off, and special effects (practical or CGI), it’s not about high speed chases and explosions . . .action is actors portraying characters who are working as hard as they can (verbally and mentally as well as physically) to protect their imaginary lives and defeat, hopefully,  the bad cyborg monsters (oh, yeah, there appear to be a LOT of them in this sequel) and win the day. . . . until, of course, it’s time for the next installment of a new (and improved?) sci-fi soup opera  franchise: As the Terminator Turns.

 

And what about that acting! Boy, that’s where this movie really falls apart, there’s no real acting going on, it’s just a herd of performers sputtering a bunch of lines that make no sense to them or to the audience, “Just following orders, sir!” stepping on the mark at the right time . . . turning left, right, smiling on cue, crying on cue, yelling on cue and . . .  well, that’s about it. It’s not acting at all. It’s more like theatrical calisthenics. Sarah Connor (Emilia Clarke) and Kyle Reese (Jai Courtney), our time-crossed lovers have no “chemistry.” I hate using the word chemistry, but I can’t think of any other word that can describe how dull, how plodding every scene is when they are the focal point. Although most of the cast seems to be just reciting lines, J. K. Simmons playing Detective O’Brian does a great job in a role that doesn’t seem to have any real storytelling reason for even being in this movie.

 

The original Terminator (1984) was made for 6.5 million dollars. Terminator: Genisys cost 170 million to produce and it’s a far, far less effective than the original. My question to you, fellow time travelers . . . how in the hell is that possible? How can anybody spend 170 million dollars on a movie and not make really, really good one? Simple, they don’t worry about writing a great script. All the money is spent on special effects because in their little minds the only reason anyone goes to see an action film is to see stunts, special effects and . . . well, you know the drill. Do yourself a favor, skip Genisys, rent a copy of the original Terminator and see how a movie SHOULD be made.